Maintaining A Healthy Level of Insanity

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don’t disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it “In”.

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

6. Finish all your sentences with “In accordance with the prophecy.”

7. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

8. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

9. When the money comes out the ATM, scream “I won! I won!”

10. Tell your children over dinner, “Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go.”

11. Answer the phone in a different voice every time the phone rings and proceed to transfer the call to yourself.

12. Dial the phone number of the guy in the next cubicle whenever he walks away from his desk. Hang up before he can run back to answer it. Repeat often.

13. Change the settings in a coworker’s word processing software so that any instance of the letter “x” is auto-corrected to read “xxx.”

What are your tips for maintaining healthy levels of insanity? Please share!!!

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